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Alex Memories
Jun. 23rd, 2012 04:57 pmCanon memories
Accidentally drowning his little brother
Alex is in the boat. They're in the boat together, he and Josh. They've been squabbling, arguing over something. What it is doesn't matter now. None of it matters. His brother grabs for him, and he pushes him back, and then Josh is falling, and screaming, and reaching out for him, and Alex can't grab him, can't reach him in time, and there's nothing he can do. His brother disappears beneath the water. Alex just stares.
His dad being mean to him/belittling him/generally making him feel like crap
"Why can't you be more like your brother? Why can't you do as you're told?"
His brother is a child. Alex isn't a child, and can't be like that, can't just do as he's expected to do, can't just go along with whatever his father says. His father leans in close, poking him in the chest, attempting to get a rise out of him. Maybe he wants Alex to hit him, to prove that he has feelings, that he's a man, that he can take his father's punishment, but he doesn't. His father continues to yell. Alex wants to put his hands over his ears, to block it out, but that will just make it worse. The yelling continues.
Fighting monsters in Shepherd's Glen (and kicking ass and taking names!)
They're horrible. They're disgusting. And they attack fast. Alex is glad he has the training he needs, glad that when he grabs the lead pipe from the ground that he knows exactly what to do with it. He slams it into one of the monsters, hard, but it doesn't go down, so he hits it again, harder this time, his only desire to get himself out of here, to survive. He's covered in blood. The monster is on the ground, writhing, but it's not dead, and as he stomps it over and over, blood covers his shoes and jeans.
Seeing Elle for the first time again in five years
He thought she was a ghost. Hadn't she died? Hadn't everyone here died? But here she was, putting up signs on the bulletin board, looking for the missing, just like he was, and she was real, and she wasn't his imagination playing tricks on him, and for the first time since he'd stumbled back into Shepherd's Glen, he felt like he was actually home.
Being in the hospital after he killed his brother
They didn't leave him alone. Every day, every night, they bothered him, wanting him to talk about it, wanting him to say what had happened, what he'd done. Sometimes he was strapped down, unable to speak, and sometimes they injected him with something that made him feel strange and far away. His parents visited once, disapproval and grief on their faces. He'd always known he'd fail them. He wished he didn't have to look at them, but he did. They talked about an operation, an operation they wanted him to have that would "help" him. He didn't understand.
Weird half-memories about being in the military that aren't actually real
Explosions. Gunshots. The sounds would never leave him, nor would the way that he flinched at any sudden noise, the way he cringed away from bright lights. The memories were foggy, half-formed, something about being in the desert, in sand, seeing his comrades die. Why couldn't he remember any of it? Why was it all so distant and strange?
Accidentally drowning his little brother
Alex is in the boat. They're in the boat together, he and Josh. They've been squabbling, arguing over something. What it is doesn't matter now. None of it matters. His brother grabs for him, and he pushes him back, and then Josh is falling, and screaming, and reaching out for him, and Alex can't grab him, can't reach him in time, and there's nothing he can do. His brother disappears beneath the water. Alex just stares.
His dad being mean to him/belittling him/generally making him feel like crap
"Why can't you be more like your brother? Why can't you do as you're told?"
His brother is a child. Alex isn't a child, and can't be like that, can't just do as he's expected to do, can't just go along with whatever his father says. His father leans in close, poking him in the chest, attempting to get a rise out of him. Maybe he wants Alex to hit him, to prove that he has feelings, that he's a man, that he can take his father's punishment, but he doesn't. His father continues to yell. Alex wants to put his hands over his ears, to block it out, but that will just make it worse. The yelling continues.
Fighting monsters in Shepherd's Glen (and kicking ass and taking names!)
They're horrible. They're disgusting. And they attack fast. Alex is glad he has the training he needs, glad that when he grabs the lead pipe from the ground that he knows exactly what to do with it. He slams it into one of the monsters, hard, but it doesn't go down, so he hits it again, harder this time, his only desire to get himself out of here, to survive. He's covered in blood. The monster is on the ground, writhing, but it's not dead, and as he stomps it over and over, blood covers his shoes and jeans.
Seeing Elle for the first time again in five years
He thought she was a ghost. Hadn't she died? Hadn't everyone here died? But here she was, putting up signs on the bulletin board, looking for the missing, just like he was, and she was real, and she wasn't his imagination playing tricks on him, and for the first time since he'd stumbled back into Shepherd's Glen, he felt like he was actually home.
Being in the hospital after he killed his brother
They didn't leave him alone. Every day, every night, they bothered him, wanting him to talk about it, wanting him to say what had happened, what he'd done. Sometimes he was strapped down, unable to speak, and sometimes they injected him with something that made him feel strange and far away. His parents visited once, disapproval and grief on their faces. He'd always known he'd fail them. He wished he didn't have to look at them, but he did. They talked about an operation, an operation they wanted him to have that would "help" him. He didn't understand.
Weird half-memories about being in the military that aren't actually real
Explosions. Gunshots. The sounds would never leave him, nor would the way that he flinched at any sudden noise, the way he cringed away from bright lights. The memories were foggy, half-formed, something about being in the desert, in sand, seeing his comrades die. Why couldn't he remember any of it? Why was it all so distant and strange?
